Heaven Read online

  “I know my actions were reckless,” he said. “I hate myself for it.”

  “Don’t.” I put my hand on his broad shoulder. “You made a huge sacrifice for me. I wish you weren’t suffering for it now, but you saved Xavier’s life … and mine. Nobody is angry with you. We’re here to help you get through this.”

  “Thank you,” Gabriel murmured. “I hope it’s a swift recovery. I feel as if I don’t recognize myself.”

  “You know yourself, Gabe,” I replied. “You’ve always known exactly who you are and what your purpose is.” I squeezed his hand. “He might be buried right now, but the Gabriel we know and love is still in there. And don’t you worry, he’ll be back.”

  23

  I Know Something You Don’t

  “YOU can’t go back to school,” Ivy told us.

  Even though I knew it’d been coming, it still stung like a slap in the face. Ole Miss represented everything that had been remotely normal about our lives. Now I felt like Peter Pan, with my nose pressed up against the nursery window, looking in on the life I was forever barred from and the people that would soon forget me. Only Peter Pan got to stay young forever. I felt like Xavier and I were a hundred years old, world-weary with no will to fight anymore.

  I longed to go back to school and start over with a clean slate. I wanted to go to class and football games and be surrounded by the buzz of human activity. But here was only the lonely ring of silence and the heavy weight of conversations yet to be had, hanging in the air. Xavier and I would always have each other but I didn’t know anymore if that meant we shared the burden or doubled it. There was just too much destruction around us to comprehend. I wanted to make it all go away. I even missed Mary Ellen and longed to have a tedious conversation with her about nail polish or sorority rankings—anything that didn’t revolve around the mess our lives had become.

  Gabriel had disappeared somewhere in the woods without telling us where he was going. Ivy said he needed time to come to terms with what had happened.

  “He might not be the same until his wings are fully restored,” she said.

  “Really?” I asked. “It’s going to take that long?”

  “Our wings are like our soul,” she said drily. “Imagine if someone took a knife to your soul. It takes awhile to repair.”

  “I wish I could help him.”

  “You can’t,” my sister said, and I thought I detected a note of bitterness in her voice. I wouldn’t be surprised if she blamed everything on me. I had set the ball in motion the moment I’d slipped that ring on my finger. But it was too late to change things now. Ivy gave a heavy sigh. “Just go and get your things from campus and come straight back. Don’t talk to anyone if you can help it.”

  “Okay.” I nodded. I’d caused enough trouble; the least I could do was obey this one request.

  * * *

  BACK on campus, I crept up to my dorm, praying Mary Ellen wouldn’t be there and for the first time all week, I was in luck. I grabbed my bag out of the closet and started yanking clothes off the hangers, dumping them inside. It was a good thing I didn’t have too many possessions and ten minutes later I was done. I decided I better leave Mary Ellen a note, in case she reported me missing to the school. I wracked my brains for what might seem an acceptable excuse for taking off a month into the semester. In the end I couldn’t think of anything so I scrawled: “Family emergency. Had to leave. Good luck for rush!” I knew it wasn’t even halfway plausible, but I hoped it might be enough to stop her from reporting anything.

  I met Xavier outside and together we headed straight for the parking lot. He had been to his apartment, clearing out his room and like me, only had one bag crammed full of possessions. I knew why: Anything that wasn’t a necessity had to be left behind. That was life on the run.

  “What did you tell the boys?” I asked.

  “Nothing,” he said. “They weren’t there.”

  I knew it hurt him to leave his friends in the lurch with no explanation. He had lived with them in close quarters and gotten to know them well. I knew they took the bond of brotherhood seriously. But what explanation could he possibly offer? Nobody would understand our sudden departure, not even the closest of friends.

  As we loaded the car, I threw a last glance over my shoulder, trying to absorb as much of Ole Miss as possible and cement it in my memory. I wondered if I would ever see the leafy campus again, with its old buildings and fun-loving students—the perfect blend of the past and the present. I looked over the hill to where people were making their way to class in the sunshine, backpacks slung over their shoulders and textbooks bundled under their arms. They stopped to talk to one another and texted rapidly on their cell phones. It was so wonderfully normal. But I forced myself to tear my eyes away.

  We were just slamming the trunk shut when a voice called out behind us.

  “Hey! Where are y’all going?”

  It was Clay, Xavier’s former roommate. I spun around apologetically. Clay had been such a good friend to us both, he’d made us feel welcome and we both genuinely liked him.

  “Hey, man,” Xavier bit his lip. “We’re taking a trip.”

  “Where?” Clay asked. “And where have you been?”

  “I wish I could tell you,” Xavier replied. “But I can’t. You gotta trust me on this.”

  “Dude,” Clay said in disbelief. “You can’t just take off.”

  “There’s no time to explain right now,” I said. “But we have to go.”

  His gaze fell on my packed bag through the rear window. I’d been in such a hurry to leave that I hadn’t even bothered to zip it up properly and my clothes were spilling out.

  “You’re not coming back, are you?” Clay looked wounded. “And you weren’t going to tell us?”

  “We wanted to,” I told him. “But the less you know about us the better. We don’t want to drag you into our mess.”

  Clay’s eyes widened. “What have you done?” he asked.

  Before I could respond, I felt Xavier grab my wrist. I diverted my attention from Clay for a moment and saw it. The Seven was standing just a few meters to the right. It was dressed in the same long black coat, its hands buried deep in the pockets. Its hideous empty eye sockets seemed to be staring right at us. I couldn’t help myself—I gasped aloud and Clay spun around.

  “What?” he asked nervously. “What’s the matter?”

  I realized with a start that he couldn’t see it. It was standing right behind him and he was completely oblivious to its presence. After the last debacle, the Seven was making itself visible only to those it hunted. Was that an edict handed down by the Covenant? Or were they just playing it safe?

  “Get in the car!” Xavier shouted as he flung open his door and twisted the key in the ignition.

  “Go home, Clay!” I yelled as I jumped in the passenger seat. “You need to leave now!”

  “What the heck!” Clay cried as Xavier reversed out of his space and hit the gas, pulling out of the parking lot at breakneck speed. The Seven didn’t give chase—it never did. It just watched and waited. I knew it would come after us, in its own sweet time.

  Xavier didn’t slow down until we were outside of Oxford, on the open road. Even then, the tension didn’t let up. We were so sick of being pursued and yet we couldn’t give in; we knew what the consequences of that would be.

  “You should pull over,” I told him once the town was a safe distance behind us. “We need to call Gabriel and Ivy, let them know what happened.”

  Ordinarily, we would have gone home, but we didn’t want to lead the Seven straight to our hiding place. It was safer to make a break for it and let my siblings deal with the rest. I hoped the added stress wouldn’t worsen Gabriel’s condition.

  “I can’t stop here,” Xavier said. “This road is too exposed.”

  “Good thinking.” I pointed to a disused barn up ahead. “See there? Pull up around back and I’ll call from inside so we’re out of view.”

  Xavier swung the car
off the road and parked it close to the weathered old barn. Graying bales of hay were stacked inside and I could see rusted machinery that looked like it hadn’t been used for years.

  “I’ll make it quick,” I promised as I ducked inside. Xavier paced agitatedly while I punched numbers into my cell.

  “What’s happened?” Ivy’s voice was tense with worry when she picked up. They must have already sensed we had a situation on our hands.

  “A Seven,” I said breathlessly. “One turned up just as we were leaving.”

  “I told you to make it quick!” Ivy burst out.

  “Don’t yell at me,” I countered. “We were only there half an hour!”

  “Okay.” I heard her exhale loudly. “Where are you now?”

  “Just off the highway outside of Oxford. We’re still in Lafayette County.”

  “Stay right where you are,” she instructed. “We’re coming to get you.”

  “Okay,” I lowered my voice. “Is Gabriel … will he come with you?”

  “Maybe this is just what he needs,” Ivy replied. “To snap him out of it. You stay low and stay hidden. Don’t go out in the open. We’ll see you soon.”

  The line went dead as she hung up and I turned to face Xavier.

  “They’re coming,” I said, forcing a tight-lipped smile. “We shouldn’t worry.”

  Xavier crossed the barn, loose straw crunching under his shoes, and kicked at a haystack. In his checked shirt and worn leather boots, he looked comfortable in this environment. A piece of machinery hanging overhead groaned and swayed. Xavier glanced up and knitted his brows together above his vibrant blue eyes. I tried to walk across to him, but tripped myself up on a bucket full of muddy water.

  “This place is a death trap,” he said with a smile as he helped me up and brushed off my clothes.

  “We won’t be here long,” I replied.

  “I almost wish they would find us.” He sighed. “So we can get this over with.”

  “They’re not going to get us,” I said forcefully. “I won’t let it happen.”

  “We’re going to have to face them eventually,” he said. “We can’t run forever.”

  “We don’t know what will happen if they find us,” I argued. “We can’t risk it.”

  “Yeah, well, this game of cat and mouse is getting old.”

  “I agree,” said a rasping voice.

  We both looked up to see the Seven standing before us in his long black overcoat, blocking the entrance to the barn. I glanced around but there was no feasible point of escape. I grabbed Xavier’s arm and held on tight as if that would keep us from being torn apart.

  “At last,” the Seven said. “You two have been eluding us for quite a while.”

  “Take a hint,” Xavier said boldly. “We don’t want to be friends.”

  “How amusing,” the Seven said drily.

  “Why can’t you leave us alone?” I positioned myself in front of Xavier even though he was a good head and shoulders taller than me.

  “I’m afraid that is impossible.”

  “What exactly do you want from us?” Xavier asked, lifting me up easily and pushing me behind him.

  “We want to restore order,” the Seven answered in his sandpaper monotone. “It is our job to keep the peace.”

  “Good job on that so far.” Xavier gave him a sarcastic thumbs-up.

  “Look, I get it,” I said, suddenly exhausted. “I know it’s against all our rules to be in love with a human but it’s done now. There’s nothing I can do to change it.”

  “Human.” The Seven smiled. “Is that what you think he is?”

  “Excuse me?” I demanded.

  “Hey.” Xavier straightened, slightly offended. “What the heck is that supposed to mean?”

  “You really don’t know, do you?” the Seven mused, like he found this information greatly satisfying.

  “No, so why don’t you fill in the gaps?” I replied.

  “There are forces surrounding this boy.”

  “Care to elaborate?” Xavier snapped. The Seven’s smug attitude was getting on his nerves.

  “We lost track of you, all those years ago,” the Seven said. “You disappeared in a sea of human chaos. But we always knew one day you would find your way back. And so you have.”

  “What are you talking about?” I insisted. “I thought you were looking for me.”

  “We were,” the angel replied. “Until we discovered his true identity. Now he must serve us.”

  “Hey, he’s not your property,” I said, overcome with indignation.

  Xavier moved closer to me so our shoulders were touching. “And I’m not your servant.”

  I felt my heart drop to my shoes as the realization sank in. They were no longer after me, coming to dole out my punishment and drag me back to my former home. It was worse—they wanted Xavier.

  “What do you want from him?” I choked out.

  “We have plans for him,” the Seven said, twisting his smooth bald head and pointing a crooked finger at Xavier. “Heaven needs you.”

  “What are you, Uncle Sam?” Xavier said gruffly. “Earth needs me. I have a life; I have a family. And I’m not leaving Beth.”

  “I anticipated as much,” the Seven said, and he thrust out a palm toward us.

  But before his power could touch us, I reached out and grabbed Xavier’s hand, letting all the anger and regret that had welled up inside me surge through my body.

  “It’s just us,” I told him. “Us against the world.”

  Xavier’s hand tightened around mine and then, for the first time, I felt a different power mingling with my own and realized it was coming from him. It wasn’t angelic like Ivy or Gabriel might produce but it certainly wasn’t human. It tasted like sunshine and my mind flooded with a beautiful aqua blue that made my worry wash away like a receding tide. It rippled and danced and I realized it was water, cool, refreshing life-giving water. I felt a breeze rush through my body, followed by a pulsing heat and then a solidness that seemed to plant my feet firmly on the ground, like not even a tornado could move me.

  And then, slowly, it dawned on me; air, water, fire, earth. I was experiencing all the elements in a single rush. But I wasn’t producing the sensations—my power felt like light; bright, blazing white light that made you feel as though you were floating. This power was coming from Xavier. He was an embodiment of the earth and that’s what I could feel surging from his fingertips. Everything magnificent the earth could produce, the strongest forces of nature, seemed to be flowing from his body. What did that mean? Were the elements under his control? All I knew was that Xavier seemed to have Mother Nature on his side, as if Our Father were commanding the very earth itself to rise up and stand by him. Xavier’s eyes were shut and I knew I couldn’t disturb him. Instead, I focused on contributing every scrap of energy I had on letting our abilities feed one another.

  So when the Seven’s power reached us, it seemed to hit an invisible shield and shattered into a thousand pieces of clay on the ground. He conjured a shimmering, opal-colored orb in his hands and hurled it at us, like a shot put. This time, it burst into flame a foot away from us and the cinders floated down like glowing confetti. The next orb exploded in a dazzling arc of water, drenching the Seven from head to foot.

  “What trickery is this?” the Seven hissed.

  “Walk away,” Xavier said darkly. “You can’t touch us.”

  “My power usurps yours,” the Seven said, although he didn’t sound so confident anymore.

  “Yeah?” Xavier asked. “Prove it.”

  “Arrogant boy.” The Seven made a low growling noise in the back of his throat.

  “Yep, that’s me.” Xavier shrugged.

  The Seven dropped back a few paces. “You should know that surrender is imminent,” he said. “You cannot fight us indefinitely.”

  “Oh, well, we’ll do our best.”

  “Very well,” the creature said. “But you are only delaying the inevitable.”

&n
bsp; And then with a sound like flapping wings, he was gone.

  Xavier dropped my hand and bent over, bracing his hands on his knees. A slight sheen of sweat had broken out across his brow.

  “Crap,” he exhaled. “What was that?”

  “I … I don’t know,” I replied. “I think it was you.”

  “No.” He shook his head, still breathing heavily. “It was us.”

  “We took on a Seven?” I almost laughed at the absurdity of it. “Without help? We really made it leave.”

  “Yeah, we did.” Xavier’s brilliant azure eyes fell on me and he smiled. “I guess we’re stronger than we thought.”

  And it seemed we were. When Gabriel and Ivy turned up a few moments later, the crisis had passed. There was nothing left for them to do. We had saved ourselves.

  24

  The Best-Kept Secret

  THERE was a conversation waiting to be had. Xavier and I both knew it as we followed my siblings back to the house. We may have been reveling in our single-handed defeat of one of Heaven’s most notorious hunters, but we couldn’t ignore what he’d said. “Human? Is that what you think he is?” The words kept ringing in my head. What was that supposed to mean? Of course Xavier was human. I’d seen him bleed. I’d seen him nearly die. That classified him as human, right? I concluded the Seven had just been trying to rattle us. Ivy and Gabriel would clear everything up when we got home.

  Back in the kitchen, Xavier hesitated in the doorway.

  “All right, out with it,” Gabriel said. “What did he tell you?”

  My brother seemed better than he was a few days ago, but still not quite himself. He was more impatient and unwilling to skirt around the truth. The old Gabriel might have worded things more tactfully, tried to steer the conversation naturally in the direction he wanted. But he wasn’t wasting time and cut straight to the point. It was sort of refreshing.

  “He said I wasn’t human.” Xavier folded his arms. “And that Heaven needs me, they have plans for me or something. That’s crazy, right?”